What are the types of relationships you can have? And which of these describes your relationship? Is it one or maybe more?
It can be hard to know the types of relationships there are and which category yours falls in. When you fall in love with someone, you can’t predict the direction the relationship will go.
The relationship could be perfect. Or, at times, it could be painful and incredibly difficult to endure. This person could be your best friend, or they can add a bit of romance to your life.
But there is always the hope for a perfect romance.
Every new relationship you find yourself in is a whole new experience, even if you’ve been in several relationships already. Sure, your past helps guide you into the future, but no two relationships are the same.
Blending types of relationships
Every relationship you experience will be something you carry with you, learn from, and remember. But, just because each impacts you, it doesn’t mean they will all be pleasant experiences.
Some lovers may be selfish, and others may be unfaithful. You could come across a dysfunctional or codependent relationship. But, with that, there is always the chance you will come across someone who is just perfect for you.
So what separates these types of relationships? What are the differences between the good ones and the bad ones?
Well, the answer isn’t that simple. No relationship is all good or all bad. Even the worst relationships have good times and memories. And even the healthiest relationships have less than healthy moments.
No relationship can be defined in just one way.
A mixture of relationships
Not only will you likely live through a collection of relationships during your life, both brief and long-term, but each of those will carry its own depth.
Although on the surface a relationship may seem positive and joyful, on other levels, it could be problematic. And even the most disastrous relationships can bring you peace.
Try not to get too weighed down by these definitions. Just like people, relationships cannot be defined just one way. There is too much involved for that to be the case.
Types of relationships
There are many kinds of unique relationships that you could experience in your lifetime. In fact, the real number is infinite.
But, if you’re struggling to define your relationships, these labels can help steer you in the right direction. Just remember, your relationship could be, and likely is, a variety of these types.
And these aren’t all of them. Although they may be the most common types of relationships, don’t feel lost if you don’t connect with any of them. Your relationship is its own unique merger of two or even more people, and that is perfectly alright, as long as you’re happy.
But if you aren’t, communicate with your partner. Seeing which of these relationships it seems you have versus what you want can help you start an important conversation.
1. Codependent relationship
Do you need your partner to function efficiently in your life? This is the kind of relationship where you’re too dependent on your partner and completely rely on them to help you with your decision-making. This can go both ways as well.
You can both be codependent, which is even worse. If you require the other person to define yourself, the relationship has taken over your life.
2. Controlling relationship
One partner plays a dominant role in the romance, while the other partner just follows the rules. This can really impact someone’s self-esteem and is often caused by trust issues or a need for power.
It can go on for a long time before realizing that your partner is controlling you and not protecting you. It can lead to frustration, hopelessness, and even a need to find solace elsewhere.
3. Grieving relationship
Both of you have lost someone or have experienced something painful recently. You come together out of comfort and connection. It feels good first, but it begins feeling empty or like a placeholder for what you lost after a while.
This doesn’t mean this relationship can’t work or that it isn’t worth having. These relationships can be very helpful in working through your grief.
4. Open relationship
An open relationship is a relationship where both partners are emotionally committed to each other. But have a consensual agreement to see other people sexually. This may not be common, but it is becoming more socially accepted as people become less close-minded and less dependent on monogamy.
Just remember that this type of relationship is about communication. An open relationship is not when one person can date whoever they want as the other is committed. This is a joint decision.
5. Negotiation relationship
Both of you are happy with each other, but every now and then, there are a lot of negotiations and compromises from both sides to keep the other partner happy. This may sound like a lot to handle, but can be a very positive relationship.
Learning how to meet your partner in the middle is healthy and mature. It teaches you how to focus on the relationship without completely giving up on yourself. It helps both partners find a balance.
6. Toxic relationship
A toxic relationship can be toxic for a number of reasons and in a number of ways. For example, it can look great from the outside, or outsiders can see the negative effects of it.
Partners in this type of relationship don’t support each other. When they have a conflict, one person tries to undermine the other. They may treat the relationship like a competition, and it likely lacks all levels of respect.
7. Pastime fling
You’re in love with your partner, but you’re not so in love that you make future plans with each other. You’re happy for now, but somewhere inside, you’re convinced that the relationship won’t work out or last forever.
This is a very common type of relationship as it is based on the now. A fling focuses neither on the past or the future. You may share a connection, passion, or friendship, but you’re not worried about a future together. These relationships are the most likely to end on mutual and respectful terms.
8. Asexual relationship
Being asexual is not just one thing. It can mean different things to different people.
An asexual relationship can be where you share an emotional attachment but no sexual attraction. From the start, it can be that way, or a relationship that once included sex and now doesn’t could also be defined as asexual.
9. Trophy relationship
You’re dating your partner because it makes you look better or gives you something materialistic in return. Gold diggers and men with trophy wives are the best fit for this type of relationship.
The love in this relationship may be true, but the foundation of the relationship is built on shallow and material reasons instead of romantic compatibility.
10. Sexual affair
You’re in the relationship only for the sex. There’s no emotional connection, but there is a lot of heat and physical compatibility. So, you could not be interested in a relationship or simply don’t connect with this person on that level for a number of reasons.
You’re sexually infatuated with each other, but it doesn’t go further than that.
11. Distracted relationship
Many college sweethearts experience this type of relationship several years down the road. Both partners are in love but it fades over time. They’re too focused on their careers or the kids to give enough time to each other.
This is a common type of relationship. Many young marriages go from magical and romantic to distracted and routine because both partners are growing apart rather than together. They have other priorities, and their relationship falls by the wayside.
12. Imperfect relationship
You know your relationship isn’t perfect, but you don’t really want to change it. So you don’t complain because you’ve accepted your partner.
Now, this can be a good thing or a bad thing. No relationship is perfect. Accepting that and finding happiness together is great. But living with true problems and letting them go because you think you don’t deserve more leads to low self-esteem and resentment.
13. Unhappy relationship
You’re not happy in your relationship, but you’re staying, not for love, but something else. This could be for the kids, so you’re not alone, so you don’t have to date again, or because you miss what you used to have.
This is extremely common. Many types of relationships can become unhappy at a certain point, but many people would rather stay unhappy in the wrong relationship than be alone or face the truth.
14. Long-distance relationship
Both of you love each other and are connected to each other emotionally. But physically, both of you live in two different area codes and share minimal physical intimacy. As a result, you’d have to deal with insecurities and jealousy, and several bouts of suspicion now and then.
The end goal of this type of relationship is to move to be together physically as well.
15. Complicated relationship
Complicated relationships are the trickiest types of relationships. Both partners may know that things aren’t great, yet both of you have no idea how to fix the issues or deal with them. There could be resentment, distrust, or several problems, but instead of facing them healthily, or anyway, they are mishandled or, worse, ignored.
A complicated relationship can benefit from couples counseling or therapy. This will get both partners to speak honestly about what they want.
16. Emotional affair
This is the kind of secret affair you have with someone other than your own partner.
You may not realize you’re falling for this person, but you’ve become attached. So much so that you’d willingly jeopardize your own relationship to be with this other person.
17. Friends with benefits
The friends with benefits relationship is a no-strings-attached agreement between two people, where there’s sexual intimacy and a bond of friendship, but no romance. This relationship is based on casual sex. It is meant for fun and for physical fulfillment with someone you like and trust.
This seems like a great agreement, but it almost always becomes more complicated when one person or both catch feelings.
18. Love-hate relationship
There’s loads of chemistry and sexual attraction in this relationship. But as much as there is love and passion, there’s the same amount of hate and frustration.
Both of you are crazy about each other and yet, can’t stand each other at times. But, unfortunately, this is often the sort of relationship you see unfold on television or in movies. For example, Noah and Allie in The Notebook had this relationship, and it required an immense amount of work.
Do you know that a couple that has loud passion fights in front of strangers and is then seen hardcore making out an hour later? That is a love-hate relationship, and you could be in one. This can be fun for a while, as it is intense and overwhelming. But in the long run, it becomes more stress and work than it is worth.
19. Insecure relationship
Both of you may lead your own independent lives and have your own friends. And as much as you try to convince your partner that you’re loyal, your partner may always assume you’re cheating or are interested in someone else. You could also be the one who is doubtful of your partner’s intentions or actions.
You can help your partner to a certain extent with patience and understanding. But, beyond a point, you can’t do much. This is a problem that the person feeling insecure needs to handle mostly on their own.
20. Abusive relationship
This relationship is where one partner holds the reins and controls the other partner, either verbally or physically. This is an unacceptable situation and needs to be left immediately. Not only is it dangerous, but also illegal.
If a partner ever tries to control you or places their hands on you, walk away and get help from someone you trust. As hard as it may seem, this is the only way to protect yourself. Many people try to convince themselves that it is a solitary incident or forgivable, but it never is.
21. May-December relationship
Are you in a relationship with someone who’s at least a decade and a half older or younger than you? Then you’d qualify for the May-December romance. Of course, compatibility matters here, but beyond that, you still need to learn to deal with different expectations from each other, family, and the views of your friends.
Age may just be a number, but it can alter a lot of things in a relationship like having children, retirement, not to mention energy levels, and interests.
22. Sacrificial relationship
This is unconditional love in its worst form. You’re dating someone you truly love with all your heart, but your partner doesn’t seem to love you with the same intensity as you love them.
In a sacrificial relationship, one person is always giving more, and the other is taking. It is unbalanced and unfair. No matter how much love there is, this kind of relationship will only lead to bitter fights and helpless tears.
23. On and off relationship
On and off relationships are incredibly common. We’ll bet you know more than one couple who has broken up and made up more than once. Unfortunately, you may be in that couple.
These relationships end for a reason. The makeups are often brought on by grief, loneliness, and an ideal version of your ex that only exists when you’re not together. As a result, on and off relationships have a low chance of working out in the long run.
24. Stepping stone relationship
This is the type of relationship you are in only to get to the next one. At the moment, you may not realize it, but in hindsight, it was something you needed to experience to get to the next step of your life.
For me, this was a brief relationship I had after a long and dysfunctional one. My ex was lovely and made me feel special. I needed that boost of confidence to move forward in my life and feel good about myself and my love life.
25. Fun relationship
This is a relationship filled with adventure and fun. You aren’t concerned with meeting friends or family. There isn’t stress about when you’ll label things or take the next step. Instead, you are enjoying each other each day.
A fun relationship is great for people who are good at communicating. Without that, this relationship can take a turn when one person has differing expectations.
26. True love
This is the hardest type of relationship to find. But it is worth the work, patience, and time. Both of you are compatible, understand each other, and accept each other. You aren’t perfect, but with imperfections, you still find happiness.
Hopefully, you now better understand the types of relationships, which kind you have, and what to do about it.