Do you want your first dates to be fun and exciting? Here are 30 things to talk about on a first date that’ll charm your date and make them want a second!
While dating is lots of fun, it also requires your time, effort, and energy. If you are like most people, you feel a little nervous every time you go on a date. You spend time getting ready, picking your outfit, and so on, but no doubt you start to panic a little about whether or not it will go well. It’s important to also think about things to talk about on a first date to calm your nerves.
What’s the worst that could happen?
One of the worst things that can happen on a first date is completely running out of things to say. It is a very common fear for those new to dating, and even those who are dab hands at the dating game.
You might be the nervous, shyer sort or brim full of confidence, but either way sometimes you just don’t click, or you both fancy each other too much and get really nervous. Sometimes for some inexplicable, horrifying reason, you mind goes completely blank and you can’t think of anything to say.
But not anymore, because once you have the right things to talk about on a first date, everything just gets easier!
Things to talk about on a first date and why it matters
Honestly, we’re all worried about the things to talk about on a first date. But why is that? Are we worried we’ll say something stupid? Or do we hate the awkward silence? Well, those are valid questions and reasons, but mostly, what we fear most about first date conversations is the fear that our date may dislike us because we’re “boring”!
Focusing on this makes everything worse, we feel anxious, jittery, and awkward. And it shows. Big chances are, your date would be feeling the same way too. So your first motive in every date should be to make your date feel at ease as soon as possible, and simultaneously, make yourself feel at ease too.
Small talk and first dates
Small talk is awkward. But it’s important because the right kind of small talk can make us feel at ease instantly. You can’t throw questions at your date one after the other, and assume everything will just easier as the date progresses.
Just relax, say hello, give them a hug, and sit down. Smile, and remember a few perfect questions. Just keeping a few of the things to talk about we’ve got here will make everything way smoother. And you’ll be able to calm your nerves and start to feel relaxed real soon too.
So let’s get straight to the questions, all the way from the small talk to first-date-appropriate deeper questions that’ll help you get to know your date. And make them feel comfortable and feel at ease too!
30 perfect things to talk about on a first date
Awkward silences occur pretty often when you don’t know someone well, so dating becomes all about the art of making small talk.
Luckily, there are ways to go into a first date feeling more confident and prepared. Essentially arming yourself with lots of questions and emergency backup topics of conversation if things stop flowing naturally.
First dates are all about getting to know someone, so with that in mind, these great conversation starters and questions give you lots of things to talk about on a first date.
#1 How was your day? The very first question you must ask! A simple question, but it shows you are friendly and that you care. It’s an easy one for them to answer and breaks the ice.
#2 Where are you from originally? Finding out where they are from as well as the different places they lived throughout their life is great for getting to know someone. You might find you lived in some of the same places. If not, remember to ask, ‘what was that like?’ to keep the conversation flowing.
#3 How big is your family? Find out what their family life is like, whether they have any brothers or sisters, and if they like having a big/small family.
#4 What were you like as a kid? Were they naughty and rebellious or super sweet? Finding out what they were like as a kid and their school days brings up fun memories and stories.
#5 What do you do for a living? People talk about their jobs for hours. Find out what they do now as well as jobs they had in the past.
#6 Do you like it? Finding out whether they like their role and why/why not can be the start of an interesting conversation.
#7 What would your dream job be? Find out what they are most passionate about, what they’d love to do, and whether they are working towards actually achieving it.
#8 What did you study at school/college/university? Talking about your school and university days is always interesting. Talk about what you studied as well as friends, silly nights out, clubs you joined and the experience overall.
#9 Do you have any pets? People love to talk about their pets if they have them. Their answer might also be a deal breaker for you!
#10 Do you like animals? If you are an animal lover and they are not, it’s best to find this out ASAP!
#11 What kind of music are you into? For people that know their music, this can be a particularly fruitful topic of conversation to bring up. You can talk about your favorite bands and artists, gigs you’ve been to, festivals attended, and so on. It gives you a good idea as to whether your tastes are compatible. Plus, ideas for future dates!
#12 What would your perfect date be? Find out what they like and don’t like about the dating game. Funny stories of previous dates are also a bonus.
#13 Where have you traveled? Sharing travel stories is another juicy topic of conversation. You can talk about the places you’ve both visited, what you loved, and where you’d like to explore next.
#14 Where would your dream holiday be? Are they a sun and beach worshipper or do they love something more active? Talk about your best and worst holidays and where you’d like to go in the future.
#15 What hobbies do you have? Finding out about their interests is so important. They might have some pretty cool hobbies which could lead to all sorts of weird and wonderful conversations.
#16 What’s your favorite book? Are they much of a reader? If you love literature, talking about books is a great conversation topic.
#17 What’s your favorite movie? Finding out what movies they love is also fun. If you like the same sort of thing you can suggest a future movie date together.
#18 What’s your death row meal? This is an interesting question and weeds out whether they are an adventurous foodie or not!
#19 What three things would you take with you on a desert island? Find out what’s most important to them with this classic date question!
#20 If you would have one wish what would it be? This is always an interesting question to ask. People give wildly different answers. Some want fame and fortune, others are more philanthropic and selfless. What are you and your date thinking?
#21 If you won the lottery, what would you do with it? This is another good question. It is fun to fantasize together what you would do with all that cash.
#22 If you had 24 hours to live, what would you do? Again, another hypothetical question that’s a lively conversation starter. Maybe tonight you should make all your wildest dreams come true!
#23 Do you have any nicknames? Finding out their cute or embarrassing nicknames is a good way to break the ice.
#24 Did you enjoy school? School can be a tricky time for many and a conversation starter that goes for hours!
#25 If you could swap bodies with any person for a day who would it be? Who do they most respect and admire? Or who do they find most glamorous and exciting? Finding out who they’d swap with and their reasons why can be quite fascinating.
#26 Who would you invite to your dream dinner party? This question is great for discovering the type of people they admire.
#27 Do you have a type? This flirty question is a cheeky way of finding out if they like you.
#28 What are your life goals? Do you have the same sort of idea about what you want from the future? Best to find out early on!
#29 What are you up to for the rest of the week? If the date goes well, subtly try to find out when you might be able to see them again.
#30 Do you want to do this again? At the end of the date, don’t forget to take their number or arrange another date. If you want to, of course!
Let’s face it, first dates are kind of like interviews, except you are both the interviewer and the interviewee! As in any job interview you want to impress, and come armed with knowledge, confidence, and having done you research, and it is far more likely to make it go well.
The last word on things to talk about on a date
Remember, you don’t need to ask all of these questions in one go. Nor do you need to memorize them all. Just ask a question, and allow the conversation to flow naturally. Each of these questions will lead to many other other questions naturally, if you listen pay attention to your date!
Just remember these things to talk about on a first date, and enjoy the conversation. And the rest, well, everything will just fall perfectly in place all by itself as long as you remember to relax, take it easy, and go with the flow!